The cycle of things that you wish didn't happen.When it happens,i just want to turn away and hope that all is wonderful again but the reality is either you go through it feeling dirty or don't bother at all.

Yet,it gets worst when you don't help but when you help,you have to fight to climb out pulling the other person's weight.At the fear of failing and unable to recover,i rather not do at times.But if i don't,i lost credibility of myself.I felt i won't be able to call myself worthy or having a heart for someone else.I just can't seem to escape from this.Am i escaping from problems?.Maybe i am.

I just wish to come home and let the rain wash away the pain away.

Live like its your last day.Many I've take it for granted.The one that ought to be valued is not and the ones ought not to,it's valued with everything.Certain bricks i lay upon one another.I felt stuck at times.No clue what it leads to of what i'm trying to build.May i find peace,strength and wisdom in your grace as these will keep me going on.

Colossians 1:11
New International Version (NIV)
11 being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience,

Upon my way to meet up a friend for a drink ,i bump into this old man pushing his broken motorcycle.Catching his breath.I walk nearer to him to see if he's ok.His frail hands and legs with every ounce of strength left, he tries to push the bike for another meter.Part of me wanting to rush to meet up with my friend as i was running late.Another part wanted to help with doubt.Who would show kindness to this man?.A small voice nudges.I walked away as i don't want to know or help this old man out of guilt.The thought lingers in me.I was talking to my friends but my heart is still at that place where i met the old man..I'm reminded.What good it is when a man gains the whole world but loses his soul?.A rich man cant even provide a decent piece of bread to the unfortunate?.Only crumbs from the table that you've left for them?.We only seek things that's best in our interest.When are we gonna' wake up?.I'm challenged.I dont know but lord,i'm sorry for i've forgotten to be thankful and being generous.Countless times,i keep for myself and not give as your Will desires.Teach me and grant me understanding.It does really take guts to be humbled.